Something that I have realized after spending so much time alone and in solitude, is I have been feeling up the empty space by staring at my phone constantly. I am not sure if the desire is coming from me wanting the urge of human interactions. I find myself consistently on social media while I am watching a movie, in the bathroom, heating my food up. It got to the point that if I had forgotten my phone I would go and get it just to hold onto it. Feeling a sense of anxiety when it was not on my person.
In this situation I felt that many of us may be going through the same thing. Becoming more reliant on social media and our phones. The one thing that I would not like to be is reliant. Especially after we make it through this difficult time. So I had made the decision to spend the weekend not touching my phone or looking at it.
On Friday I had pretty much left my phone behind me and constantly caught myself looking back to see notifications. I felt a very strong urge to see if anyone had messaged me or posted anything or even liked my content on social media. To some it may not seem like an issue but for me it is something that I strongly try to avoid. I do not want to feel like my world revolves around my phone or the content that I post. I recently started doing ice baths and the first thing I tried to do was record myself. I was sharing this moment with my cousin and he said “why do you need to record it?” Honestly, I did not have a response. When I made the decision to not record that moment. I realized the urge to take cold baths also disappeared and I really did not feel like doing it. Regardless I completed the task and honestly it was amazing (I will make another post about that later).
So here is a breakdown of Day 1:
I spent a majority of my time working till about 6pm. Then afterwards I had some beef stew and played video games (not the most productive way to spend my time). Afterwards, I watched some netflix and the urge to look at my phone was through the roof at this point that I had to put it in my desk drawer so I could not see it. That helped me so much. I 100% recommend doing that if you are trying to cleanse yourself of something, remove it from your line of sight so the brain cannot remind you of it. So that was day one. I will be trying to post my 2nd and 3rd day this weekend so stay tuned.
Thank you for reading.
I know that I have not posted as often but I am back now and will try to keep it up again.
Stay happy, Stay healthy, Keep breathing