Something that we all tend to do in the moment is make impulse decisions or heated comments. That is definitely something that I am also guilty of doing often. Do you often say it and then later you look back and tell yourself “well maybe I could have worded that differently or not said it at all”
In the moment it may be hard to realize it and I understand that it is very difficult to notice these things. Plus sometime you need to make impulse decisions that is kinda what makes life exciting as long as you are not hurting anyone in the process than 100% go for it.
The heated comments that I am thinking of are the ones that may be said to a loved one or a friend or even a colleague. The funny thing with words is that it is hard to take back because even after you may apologize or try to move past it those words or comments will stick to you when that person sees you. Good impressions are something that takes years to build but only seconds to lose and it can happen unintentionally. So a very good way to try and change the way you react to those situations are:
- take a breathe
- try to take a step back and understand the situation
- stand up and take a walk
- try to see where the other person is coming from
- learning to talk vs arguing
- make comments not statements
I would like to elaborate on the last two comments because I think those may need a little more emphasis on them. Learning to talk vs arguing is actually a very important skill because remaining calm when someone may be against your point can be hard sometimes. It is however, very effective because two heated people are going to be taking the conversation no where. So having at least one person that is calm can help the other one to calm down as well after seeing your reactions and it can also help to sway the conversation in your favor.
The other point is to make comments vs statements. Something that may lead to an argument is when you are making statements. That can make it seem that you are trying to state facts and could lead the other person in becoming defensive. So it may be better to try and let them know that what you are thinking are opinions rather than commands. One thing to remember though is just because you are trying to avoid arguments it does not mean that you should be timid. Rather change that to confidence because that is definitely a skillset that companies look for and will get you places in life. (that is my little tip of career advice)
Thank you for making it to the end I hope that this helped you guys.
Stay happy, Stay healthy and Keep breathing